I saw this on a blog and thought it was right on and so funny! Enjoy!

Tardy by Jana Mean Mom Matthews

Getting my three kids to school on time is my Mount Everest. I have, however, significant motivation to do the impossible: her name is Lorraine.Lorraine is the secretary at my daughter's elementary school. She wears sweater vests adorned with three-dimensional animals, but don't let her 1980s homemaker apparel fool you: Lorraine is as friendly as a jackal.Roughly once every three weeks, Mount Vesuvius erupts at my house at 8:50am in the form of a missing shoe, a temper tantrum, or the unexplained need to change one's clothes for the third time in one hour. On these mornings, I park my car in the school's fire lane and drag four children into the front office to do penance before St. Lorraine."May I sign in my daughter please?" I ask politely after waiting at the counter for what feels like a century. My three oldest children have already written their names on seventeen visitor badges and have attached them to their shirts.After Lorraine finishes her personal phone call/applying lipstick/rearranging her collection of angel figurines on her desk, she rises from her throne, heaves a loud sigh of disapproval, and hands me a tardy slip.Even though my kindergartner is only 2.5 minutes late for school, I'm still required to publicly confess that I don't have my act together by filling out the form, signing it, and listing a reason for her lateness. By this point in the school year, I have exhausted all of the standard excuses. Plus, Lorraine is starting to question their validity."You were really 'out of town' for five minutes?" she asked in February.Lorraine's growing suspicions that I have been less than forthright with her in the past have shamed me into telling the truth. While it used to take only a few seconds to fill out the tardy slip, now it takes me several minutes--and the front and back sides of the form--to describe my morning. Usually my epistles include the phrase "I'm going to count to five" followed at some point by “You’re not going to like this” and "against their will.""This is all avoidable," smirked Lorraine on Tuesday, "If you could get out the door five minutes earlier."I wanted to thank Lorraine profusely for coming up with a solution to my problem that I hadn't thought of myself, but I also didn't want to hold up the line. As I exited the building, I whispered words of encouragement to the handful of nervous mothers who were waiting for their turns to meet their maker.When I got home, I decided to do something nice for Lorraine in appreciation of the sensitivity and compassion she routinely shows parents who mornings are plagued with natural disasters and children who like power struggles. I missed the nominations for this year's faculty and staff recognition awards, so I had to settle for a candy poster.

I hope Lorraine likes my gift. The fact that I took all of the candies out of their packages--leaving only their wrappers—makes me worry that she won’t.

Much ado about nothing

I've logged in at least 3 times in the past week thinking I would write a new post. However I keep drawing a great big blank as what to write. There is always an endless supply of things going on that I could write about.
I mean I have six kids. They are always asking crazy questions and doing things that make me laugh.
But aside from the half dozen kiddos that follow me around and insist on calling me Mom we also live in what I refer to as "the money pit". The problem is as I've mentioned before my brain is peanut butter.
I can't remember any of the things I've made mental note to mention. How sad is that? I'm only 28! I would like to blame it on the serious lack of sleep for the last 10 years.
What do you think? I think I can pick from any number of excuses and they would all be valid.
I'm the Mom and I said so. I love that phrase. Oh don't get me wrong I hated it as a kid. But as a Mom I love the absolute authority that goes with that.
And that is the end. Goodbye

Week ??????

All right so I already lost track of how many weeks it's been since Mark left. Yes I could go back to the last post and count weeks from there but that takes time and effort something I'm a little short on these days. We went to the Dallas zoo on Saturday and it was a lot of fun. It was another beautiful Texas day (70 degrees)! Not bad for the beginning of February. Eat your heart out Oregon! Sorry I have to razz my Dad every chance I get. We have an on going competition about who's state is better even though deep down he knows it's mine! The kids were all on the honor roll again which is fabulous! I am so proud of all of them. They are such awesome little people. I enjoy watching them learn and grow. I've been really busy this last week or so training for my new career and gearing up to take the Texas State Health and Life insurance test. After the last 10 years of playing mommy I have reduced my once bright intellect to ooy gooey slow moving hard to retain peanut butter! Oh you laugh now but you know what I'm talking about! And if you don't watch out because it will happen to you too! The brain truly is a muscle and needs to be worked out to maintain it's alertness and ability to retain and learn new things. Unfortunately (and completely my fault) I have not worked mine out for a very long time and I feel it! Oh sure I keep up on current events and read for pleasure but I haven't really exercised my noggin. Wish me luck in preparing for this challenging exam and say a prayer for our solider who is still in a tent and has very limited communication with home and family. Later!

Week 2.....

Where do you begin? We had a hard week this week. Tuesday Darci and I left the kids with Ben (thank you Ben! Your awesome!) and went shopping in Austin for the twin boys they are expecting. We had a great day. We even took the time to have a nice relaxing dinner out before rushing back to the kids and Ben. We got a lot of really cute things for them. When we got home we found out that the police made a visit to our house! Apparently a window next door had been broken. They think the kids did it but when I looked at it I don't think it was possible. There are two trees and a 7 or 8 ft fence in the way. I'm a little miffed that my neighbor didn't talk to me about it. Instead she just called the police. I guess it's the day and age we live in. The week only got worse from there. Wednesday I went to Darci's to watch Libbi and Jessilyn (Jessilyn is the sweet 3 month old baby Darci watches for our friend)while she and Ben went to have an ultrasound. Shortly after beginning the ultrasound they were told that the twin boys she is carrying (Hunter David and Reece Matthew) had died! What a tragic end! She is 5months along and will have to give birth to them this week. After which she will have to bury them. We are all so heartbroken. She is doing very well. The first two days were really hard. Mom got here late Thursday night to be of comfort and support. Darci is feeling the effects of every ones prayers. They are definitely helping so keep them coming! We have been making funeral arrangements for the last couple of days. The boys will be buried in Idaho where the Fillmores have a Family cemetery. I hope to be able to go. But with 5 kids in school I don't know if I'll be able to. We thank you for all the well wishes and offers of help. Please Keep Darci and her family in your prayers. This ordeal isn't over yet. There are many more difficult times ahead as we are yet in the middle of this. Thank you once again for all that you have done or are willing to do!

It's that time again

Well......here we are again. Mark left Last Sunday for Iraq. It seems like we just did this. Oh ya we did. I think this time around is definitely harder on the kids. They have all had behavior problems this last week. But it is the first week of Daddy being gone so I'll go easy on them. Mark is stuck in limbo he isn't at his final destination point yet. He's pretty miserable. So far since he's been gone I had to take the dog to the vet to be put down (long story, not easy decision) ,went grocery shopping with 7 kids twice, returned 29 late library books with same 7 kids and took 4 kids to the dentist on the same visit! Whew that was a lot of fun. This is the short list there are lots of other fun things we did this week like...12 loads of laundry......12 loads of dishes......swept the floor 10 times........you get the idea. But truly this is all said in good humor the kids did awesome on all outings and are a big part of the cleaning. I also couldn't of done it with out the help of a very nice brother in law- Ben who came with me to the vet and the dentist. Darci would of come but she is prego w/twins! I plan to update a lot more frequently now that Mark is gone. This blog is a way we stay connected. When you have one or two phone calls a week for 15 to 20 mins for the whole family to talk It's difficult to fit in all that happened that week so I write it on this blog so he can read it and laugh at the absurdity of it all!
To Be Continued......